All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
i think the title to my autobiography shall be, "a bottle of vodka and various pieces of meat"
and this is why you're my favorite gay friend.
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
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