maybe i would like her more if 99% of her sentences didn't start with "yesterday when i was reading twilight..."
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Randomize