ya dads aren't the best wingmen
Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
Every morning i wake up and check his twitter like a horoscope
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
Last night you sang a duet with a gay man posing as a straight man posing as nicole kidman; your life lacks neither color nor texture:)
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
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