hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
Building a door into the garage so when I bring girls home my mom doesn't wake up.
Pathetic yet considerate
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
I'm going to sleep with this bank teller and I'm going to enjoy it, just try and stop me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
I gave Sophia a glitter bomb for Christmas. And before you ask is because she pooped in my cat litter box and then drank all my liquor and didn't pay me back and refuses to acknowledge that she had any wrongdoing. So she gets to clean up glitter for the next 10 years.
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