high people should be assigned attendants
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize
