i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
luckily my workout playlist doubles as a masturbation playlist.
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
You've changed since you got that strap on
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
