I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
The EMTs said they would give me as many blankets as I wanted if I didn't pee in the ambulance. They even turned on the sirens.
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
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