i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
My dad lost his bandaid somewhere in the turkey. It was a mixture of thanksgiving and an Easter egg hunt
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
Randomize