I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
this will be a night to untag.
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
Randomize
