just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
I wish we could go back in time and find our best farts ever
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
You may have noticed the broken smoke detector and melted carpet. We may have accidentally lit a ping pong ball on fire...I'm sorry, but we did our best.
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
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