I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
Randomize