i had a dream last night that you and i organized a foursome. swear to god
ps i'll be in miami in early july. this text has no relation to the last one
Dude im not sure whos apartment i woke up in but i just showered here and their shampoo in phenomenal
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
There's a skateboard on the patio and all the chips are gone. The note on the fridge says 'don't buy cheese'. Stop letting her go outside.
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.
Randomize