I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
Just threw up in a cup driving down the road because there was cop behind me and I didn't want to pull over. Not sure if winning or failing at life.
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
He dicked me, fed me creme brulee, and didn’t make a big deal out of me causing a flood to come outta my vagina
Marry him NOW
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Randomize
