i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
you yelled "who's job is it to keep me from breaking shit" and then immediately ripped off the molding as you fell down the stairs.
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
Why did I wake up with condoms on all my fingers?
Considering the girl you hooked up with, I'd be concerned about not having one on your penis.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
I wish I could open myself up and check on my liver. Make sure it's hanging on. Ya know?
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
Randomize
