My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
Randomize
