His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
My dad just told me he used to masturbate to cat woman...he then proceeded to beat my brother in beer pong and wont let me play...
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
She's the barista slut.
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
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