Regardless, you never quit out of your interenet. You left your porn on the living room comp. Then you passed out four feet from the chair with your hand still down your pants. We decided that we should go back to her place instead. Worlds best wingman.
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
I know i'm drunk when the "men" sign on the bathroom sounds chinese
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
Last night when we were having sex he put the condom on backwards the first time. While he was putting the second one on I blew up the first one, made it into a balloon and hit him in the head with it. I think we're over the honeymoon stage.
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