doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
you said youd get me home safely, you dropped me off at 9:30 last night and i just woke up on my porch.
the smoke from my cigarette strangely resembles what patrick swayzes ghost will look like.
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
Life isn't about who you kiss, drunk, at midnight. It's who you text nonsense to, sober, from the toilet.
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.
Randomize
