I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
You told her dad that you were gonna "superman that ho" I love the first impressions you make
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
somehow attending a funeral viewing turned into me snorting cocaine in the bathroom and drawing ninja turtles for children
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
Randomize
