I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
You know your life is awesome when sometimes you walk down the street eating a sandwich and you run into someone you had a threesome with. And not say hi.
this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
My phone autocorrected "shhhhh" to "AHHHHHHHHH" and I feel like that says a lot about my life
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
Randomize
