I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
i just has to use a gift card to Target that one of my students parents got me to buy Plan B bc my bank account is -$0.08 so my 2017 is starting exactly how i pictured.
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
Randomize
