My sheets look like a crime scene.
He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
Welcome aboard the S.S. struggle. I'll be your captain for today's voyage and Jeremy is your first mate. Just sit back and relax while we navigate the seas of drunken regret. Your forecast for the day is violently hungover with a chance of "shit, that really did happen!"
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Randomize