your room smells of hookers.
And success
I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm on my "fiiiiirrrst" glass of wine- the quotes mean it's the last of the bottle- so I really need you to pick up your phone so we can talk about this
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.
No I don't want to see you. You're the reason that I'm going to need a new liver by the time I'm 30.
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
Randomize