Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
why is it that no matter what your novelty license plate says it always screams "im a huge tool"?
I think my mom's writing a book called how to fuck with your kids when you know they're high
I tried to go shot for shot with some guy called "shit show martinez"
Life lesson: using the oven as a heater= $500 electric bill
Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
Why did I wake up holding food tongs?
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
