And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
You texted me 'I am the leopard prince', with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not "a little bit" drunk dude..
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
Randomize
