I'll pay for our taxi if you let me makeout with the drummer and we don't leave RIGHT when the bassist does.
Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
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Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
It's all part of my master plan: have him buy me all I can eat pizza and all I can drink beer AND THEN tell him there was no spark and we're better off as friends.
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
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