Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
So "I hate myself Mondays" has extended to Tuesday this week. I just had peanut butter and a glass of wine for lunch.
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Randomize