I woke up wearing no shirt sleeping next to a half-eaten grilled cheese.
Well did you call the grilled cheese yet? Or r u waiting the usual 3 days?
Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
non applicator tampons are so hard to put in when your drunk. i fingered myself for 10 minutes and forgot what i was trying to do.
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
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