I hate ducks.
What?
they're sketch. like squirrels. squirrels are sketch as fuck.
Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
