so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
At lowes after workin outside. Kid behind me says "mommy that man smells like a taco" yes she was talking about me.
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
Good to know: if a hot girls asks to go back to my place, she probably just needs to vomit all over my bathroom
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
This lady gave me four cups to go along with my gallon of daiquiri. Silly girl, all I need is a straw.
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
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