Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
he had hair everywhere except his balls
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
Randomize
