Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
I just cut my nipple shaving
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
she demanded that I make her breakfast too so im in the bathroom cooking bacon with her straightener
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
Randomize
