I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
I have the Everlasting Gobstopper of boners right now. It's kinda like a gift from god, but I don't want to spend anymore time with this girl than I have to.
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
Walked in the bathroom at work and my boss was taking a shit with the stall wide open and responded "oh yeah, I forgot you never have been to prison "
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
Randomize