Dude, I just saw a bird vs. squirrel fight. A car won.
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
I just realized I am holding a beer in 133 out of 134 photos of me on my facebook page.
Nobody is perfect
I'm at Waffle House wearing one of the paper hats in the other
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize