Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
this girl with a french braid down the center of her head won't stop talking about the benefits of the free market. i'm hungover, bloated and haven't slept for 4 days. shut up french braid girl, shut up.
Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you.
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
Randomize
