yo i stole a wine glass from the ritz but i spilled wine on my hundo dolla shirt
Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
Randomize
