If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
She had YOLO tattooed on her ass. Like, one cheek said YO, the other said LO. Even I can't handle that level of hot mess.
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
i woke up with a shamrock tattoo on my wrist and a fat bruise on my hipbone. please tell me its not real.
Randomize
