my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
my credit card is covered in vodka and bad memories
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
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