Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
Randomize
