After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
We are a team. I lure them in with my tits, feed them enough alcohol to consider homosexuality, and hand them off to you.
You're the best wingman ever.
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
Randomize
