what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette.
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
He is farting the alphabet right now. In the goddamned restaurant. You don't get to recommend men anymore. Or restaurants for that matter.
Just remember I’m your roommate with extremely questionable morals
Exactly, what could possibly go wrong
Randomize
