is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
My brain is like scrambled eggs. If scrambled eggs were trying to escape out of my skull through my forehead.
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
Randomize
