is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
You called his parrot a seagull, a pigeon and a rat with wings, and told it to go eat Cheetos out of a dumpster.
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
Randomize
