If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
I broke up with him in the bar & then asked him if he wanted to have a contest to see who gets the most numbers. I say I took that break up well
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
I can only send "I want your dick" texts to so many guys before I accidentally over-book myself. I need a day planner.
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
Reached a new low last night. Passed out. With my pants down. On the toilet. At ihop. Waitress had to wake me up.
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
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