Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
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