Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
Got pulled over today for going 90 in a 40 zone with my leg out of the window. Still got out of the ticket. I'm getting way too good at this. Wanna trade bodies so we can see if it's my boobs or my charm?
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
Randomize
