I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
She was blowing me when her roommate came in and goes "you want me to tap in?"
You realize once your inheritance is finalized this shit will stop happening right?
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
