Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love having hate sex.
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
I'm doing laundry in pjs and heels, home alone with my margarita bucket.
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
Someone broke into my car last night. Didn't take anything, even left the beer in my backseat. They need to get their priorities straight, obviously.
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
He has the fingertips of a God
Randomize