I'm jealous of your bromance
super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
This last weekend single handedly took me off the liver transplant list
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
Randomize
