he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
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