Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
Shark Week may as well be Shark Weed.
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
Just stole a goat. Bringing it to your house to cock block. Blame the goat not me.
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
Meanwhile I'm working a fucking flute workshop and I'm one high c away from shoving a flute up the asshole of the next passerby
Adding to the list of things I have said out loud at the bar that I shouldn't have: "I am the yoda of sucking dick"
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
Randomize
